Boat Rides, the Tundra, and a Traveling Gnome.....

This has been a very interesting week! One of my friends said if they were in their village, they'd be going crazy from boredom....and that is so not the case here!!

Earlier in the week, I got a call late one night from one of my neighbors/parents. His wife had recently passed away from cancer and his daughter was in my class last year. He told me how she was having a hard time lately and since she talked about me a lot, would I be interested in spending some time with her. I said, "Of course! Anything I could do to help!"

So I was invited the next day to go on a boat ride with him (TK) and his kids. TK had his niece there with him to help him during the day. It was a very nice trip. We went to check out his fish camp he was building and we had to climb up a dirt cliff. I made it up okay but on the way up, I had taken out some "steps" the kids had used. So getting down off the cliff became a bit of a problem. TK stood at the bottom and his kids jumped down to him. His niece and I were on our own. My idea was to slide down the cliff on my bottom. Turns out, I didn't have to.....I had grabbed the base of a skinny tree and ending up swinging down ala Tarzan ever so gracefully. I'm not kidding, TK and the rest of the crew were impressed. If only I had planned it that way......

The best part of the trip was my first visit to the tundra! It only took me a year to visit there. Again we had to climb up a cliff to get there. I wish I could say I didn't fall on my way up. At least I didn't hurt myself or even get a bruise....but yeah, I fell. TK stomped a path for me. But as I reached the top, a sweet flowery/mossy smell hit me. And spread out before me was the tundra. I could see mountains waaay far off in the distance. And walking on the tundra was like walking on a pile of sponges. Your feet sank down a bit and I had to work to keep my balance. The next day, my legs were sore....I think this is where those toning shoes get their idea....cause you work some different muscles just walking around.

A few days later, O's wife MM, myself and our Captain went down to Bethel on her boat. Boat is by far my favorite form of river travel! We did some shopping, had lunch, and shopped some more. There was no drama, no scary moments, in fact, everything went surprisingly well! Okay, so at one point we forgot about the 2nd anchor when we were leaving Bethel, but it was quickly pointed out and fixed right away. No worries.

But there has been some drama happening in the village. Namely, my garden gnome. True, I don't have a garden but I thought it would be funny to have a gnome on my porch. I wrote on the bottom that he was a cursed gnome and whoever removes the gnome would be cursed as well. And the gnome has been on my porch for quite a while.



Upon my return from my trips last week, I found a note on my door and no gnome in sight: "Ahoy Matey, Traveling the seven seas. Will throw the gnome in volcano in 24 hours unless you pay 5,000,000 pukka-shells and 2 pints swaying-palms rum." And there was a picture of my gnome on a beach.

Well, I was not in possession of that of stuff. After all, it's a dry village. So there was really nothing I could do.

The next day, I found this note: "Leave the ransom by the door of the Principal's home if you ever want to see your gnome again! Signed, Pirates of Akiak"

So I ran to the Principal's house and found this note: "You do not have the correct ransom. I guess you don't love your gnome. Kiss his *** goodbye!" And on this note was a picture of my gnome being dangled over a volcano by Captain Hook's hook.

So that was the end of my gnome......or so I thought! A few days after that, I found on my door a note with a picture of my gnome on the deck of a pirate ship: "Ahoy Matey, Your little gnome narrowly escaped the volcano by calling Parley! After a heated negotiation with our beloved Captain, he been given a reprieve! He has agreed to swab our decks in exchange for his life! I can't say if you will ever see him again, he was quite hurt by your refusal to pay the bounty. Signed, The Pirates of Akiak"

Well, that's one smart little gnome, I must say! I soon received another note, this time from my gnome. It had a picture of him walking with President Obama. "Dear Lara, Had conference with Obama, was unable to reach any kind of peace treaty for the pirates, enjoying touring Washington D.C. Still working off my debt it seems to be a bit like the national debt. It grows every day." and it was signed "Disgruntled Gnome"

The next day came this note: "Ahoy Matey, You're gnome failed us once again, he was sent to the treasury to acquire us some gold, and all he returned with was shredded paper! Perhaps he will swim with the fish after all!" And there was my gnome in the treasury.

While I did appreciate the Godfather reference, I began to worry about my gnome. But once again, according to this morning's note, he was able to gain the pirates good graces: "Dear Lara, It seems I have redeemed myself once again with the Pirates, it only took taking a little blue necklace from the Smithsonian and my life was safe from the sea. I continue my adventures with the Akiak Pirates, I may even pay off my debt one day! - Your still disgruntled Gnome!" and there was a picture of my gnome, standing next to the Hope Diamond.

Well, these pirates have good taste.....perhaps, one day my little gnome will return to me....only time will tell....and those pirates, but they aren't talking....