Basically, where I am today, right at this moment, is ready for a comeback.
But not just with writing. My 30 Day Challenge fizzled......and I got some news from my doctor that I am prediabetic.
So here I sit, closer to 300 pounds than I ever thought possible and heading for a disease that I pretty much gave myself. My self-esteem is at an all time low.....is this my rock bottom?
The positive spin on all this is that I have the power to change. I haven't had the will power yet but I noticed a difference in my thinking today that wasn't there before.
In the past, when I have decided to eat healthier, it's really boiled down to looks. I wanted to look better. Sure, more energy would be great but I don't think being skinnier is really going to change who I am on the inside. It's really all about vanity. And I could always start that journey tomorrow.
Until I found out that my inside does need changing. I don't want diabetes. I don't want something I did to myself like that.
And for the first time ever, today when I wanted a soda or a sweet (and trust me, I always want a soda and/or a sweet.) My brain said, "DIABETES!". And I held off.
Some very supportive friends have asked me, "Well, how do you know you have prediabetes? Did you get this test ______? Some tests are better than the basic glucose one."
But you know what, I'd rather not test out of a healthy range on any test. I am not healthy. I don't need medication, my levels are low enough to be in the very early stages and that is good enough for me.
It's no longer a vanity issue. It's no longer something I can start tomorrow or at the start of the week, or the month.....I don't want diabetes.
So, I started a new adventure today. Just focusing on sugar....that's my start. I am hoping down the road I will have made a full switch to a clean eating lifestyle...but a journey starts with a single step, right?
The exercising will need to start again as well. But I want to focus on getting my classroom ready for Back to School next week. But I look at my Mighty Dakota and he sure would love to get out of the house more....so many starting with an extra walk would be a good place to start.
Cheers!
2 comments:
You've taken many steps that I would have never thought possible with Alaska and then back being just a few. This is just another step and every small step counts towards what you want.
Giving up soda and such is difficult, but you can do it. Or to put it simply "You go Girl!!"
Thank you for your kind comment & support!! It brightened my day!
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