Weekly Reflections - Week 10

Well, two new teachers have left the district, one from my school and one from another village. They left for different reasons, some of which I'm not privy to. It's kind of weird to think that out of the new teachers some have already left the ranks.

I've gotten some very sweet comments from my friends and family. Mostly telling me to hang in there. But I just want everyone to know, I'm not hanging on. I'm duking it out. My days are hard but satisfying. My kids are tough, but also very sweet and loving. I'm stressed, over worked, tired but I'm making progress. Or I should say, my kids are. They are learning so much, even if it feels like I'm dragging them through their education, kicking and screaming.

I'll be teaching a lesson - AT GRADE LEVEL and my students will be engaged and learning. When we're done I feel this huge sense of accomplishment. I feel like "Yes! Now they will see that learning is fun! I will now give them a life-long love of learning!!!" And that's when one of them will turn to me and ask, "When do we get to go home?"

Wah, wah, waaaaahhhh...

They were just having fun two minutes ago!!! I swear!!!

I've never been any place like here. Some of my second graders swear, once at me. I don't think that will be happening again any time soon. I actually ignored the bait and waited until the student calmed down before we spoke of it. That took a lot of self-control on my part, let me tell you. Some of my kids chew tobacco. (That shocked me.) And some of my kids make references to drugs and alcohol. And some of my kids have stable, loving homes.

These kids see/experience way more than kids should. But I can't change their home lives. I don't even want to go there actually. I didn't come here to judge anyone. To be honest, I really don't know what all happens at home. All I know, is that I came out here to be the best teacher I can be.

I do miss my friends though. And while I have friends here, they are also my co-workers. And there are certain discussions that maybe best left unsaid to coworkers. We talk shop a lot around here. I miss the world outside of Akiak too. I'm either at home or work, home or work. I just need to get out more. Go for walks without dying. I'm looking forward to the snow. There's tons of stuff to do in the snow. Did I mention my school has cross country skis teachers can borrow? And one of my friends said they'd take me out snowmobiling. So there's lots of stuff to do once it snows. It snowed a little but it melted already.

My family had a birthday celebration for my brothers & my step-dad. I wasn't there. I was kinda sad hearing about it. I miss my family too. Well, I'll be with them at Christmas. I come back to visit Christmas Eve actually.

There was ice on the ground Friday. I took it slow. It was my first time walking on ice. Crazy, huh? I slipped a little bit, but otherwise I was fine. I cannot begin to describe how odd it is to be walking to school with a flashlight. It stays darker longer five minutes everyday they say.

Today's sunrise: 9:34 a.m.
Today's sunset: 7:26 p.m.

I think I'll make that a regular feature in my weekly reflections. It's 36 degrees outside.....I think I'm becoming more used to the cold because I was a bit chilly today walking to the school but not really cold. I didn't even wear my gloves or earmuffs. If I was in Benicia, I would be bundled up and complaining!!

Sometimes I stop and ask myself: Is this really my life? How did I get here? From The Disney Store to Akiak.....Who would have thought I'd be here on the Alaska Tundra (okay, the tundra is a mile out, whatever) teaching to a group of Yup'ik Eskimos? I wouldn't trade it......A year teaching here and I'll be able to teach anywhere....not somewhere hot though....I really don't do heat well........or mornings.....

Probably best not to make a list.....